Watch this Movie

I found a place to watch “Network” from 1976 for free!  There are subtitles in Portuguese but you can still see the film pretty well.

Network

The Network is sort of a 4th major Network sort of like Fox is today but it is in its death throes with ratings going into the toilet.  They must fire Peter Finch, the evening news guy because he’s supposedly dragging down the ratings.  When he’s told he is is to be fired, he goes nuts and his nuttiness (which is truly lucidity, since the only people who truly know reality are “nuts” and everyone else lives in a concocted fantasy to stay “sane” or is a sociopath) gets a ratings boost.  His rants start reviving the Network and he is not fired even though he had told the whole audience he would “kill himself on air next Tuesday”.

It’s a must see movie that foretells the future of what the world is today.  The main thing I got out of it is that in the future Finch says that people would not be totally human with human emotions. but, “humanoids”, products of the entertainment industry.  It has come to pass.  The rants of Peter Finch are great and sound like prophecy. The saddest part of the film is where Finch says “yes, Democracy won today, but that’s it, it’s over” after a merger with Saudi Arabia and the Network is foiled

Faye Dunaway plays Diana, the love interest who falls in love with Finch’s best friend, Max, played by William Holden.  He leaves his wife of 25 years to live with her only to find her a sociopathic unfeeling “humanoid”.  The best scene in the movie is the two breaking up where he tells her he has to leave because she is a life sucking force and that he is truly human and that he wishes to retain his humanity, even though he is old and “dying’ in this youth infested world.

There are also subplots about how Dunaway finds other subversive shows to grow the Network’s ratings.  One scene I find weird in a post 9/11 world is how Diana and Max are in bed laughing off the FBI’s attention to Diana’s shows, like they have all the freedom and the government is basically an annoyance.  How quaint.

There is also a subplot about all the corporate raiding going on behind the scenes.

I was only 10 or 11 when this film came out.  It could have been made today.  My favorite film of that era was “Jaws”.  Oh my. The most popular scene is the familiar one where Finch comes on his program, pushes another anchor off the show and says “he’s as mad as hell and he is not taking it anymore.” and gets the whole nation to scream out their windows.

Most people I know under 60 or so seem to be “humanoids” devoid of any deep emotion or loyalty.  People who have grown up since the Baby Boom era are products of media…they are “consumers”, “human resources”, get it? People are “product”.  The family is dead.  People are disposable, marriages are disposable, children are disposable.  The only thing that matters is survival.  Humanoid feral beings are now the norm.  The bus is a riding freakshow.

Perps are angrily muttering in the background.  They KNOW.  Oh they know.

There is something I want to say but I just can’t put my finger on it…you just know the show is true, though.  Remember your older relatives?  Your parents?  Your grandparents?  Remember how REAL they seemed?  I mean, I miss that.  Terribly.  There were always bad psychopathic shits around but there were REAL people around, too.  It balanced out.  It’s now the End Times.  What is accepted as “human” behavior is not normal.  It’s freakish.  Make sure not to miss the “money speech”.

I guess what I am trying to say is that evil is banal, and that is the era (1970s) when the widespread evil of the world became banal with television and violent movies-even before video games and the Internet.  It was the desensitization of the new “humanoid”.

The movies has lots of bad language and a few sex scenes, so if you are the “Focus on the Family” type you might not want to see it.

I’ll leave it to you to see the ending.  No spoiler.

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Good Book

w/o Internet at home I have more time to read..and read.  Just finished a 400+ page book called Straight Into Darkness by Faye Kellerman.  It is about pre-Hitler Germany and how a troubled understaffed police department and a detective with at least a few morals left solve a case of mass murder in Munich or “lustmord” which is I think the definition of “love of death” or something.  It also examines the state of the art and entertainment around Germany at that time.  Munich was sort of a place of middle class “respectability” compared to Berlin…so they did not get the hootchie cootchie shows as much but they did have Kabarets, or nightclubs.  It also explores the world of 1920s German art which had themes of violence (the lustmord) as well.  The main character watches as Hitler rises, and his rallies and his (eventually disposable) Brownshirts become more and more violent and how the police have trouble controlling the riots from the rallies and how the police and populance become more and more sympathetic to the Nazi cause and how honest people like Axel Berg (the main character) are getting fewer and fewer.  Kellerman leaves you guessing to the end who the killer is and the ending is a big surprise.  It is a good read for a ti as perps have been compared to Brownshirts over and over again.  Another theme is…drum roll…FOOD.  German pub food sucks apparently, and if the Germans had a better cuisine they probably would not have had to have so many wars.  I bet Postwar Germany is full of Chinese, Mexican, Indian and American food.  Kellerman uses lots of German phrases to make the novel seem authentically German even though it is written in English.  I recognized a few German words due to my Grandmother using some Yiddish words even though she spoke English.  She also spoke Yiddish and my mother understood it.  I can only make out a few food words.  Apparently Jewish food is German food, essentially, sort of like Macrobiotic food is Japanese food, essentially…except for SAUSAGE.  The Jews ate Brisket and bird not sausage

Sober–Angle of self deception? Looking at sober in a new way?

Are you Sober? Am I? What is Sober?

Is Sober merely abstaining from mind altering substances such as liquor and street drugs, or, is it also being in a rational mental state also abstaining from anger and rage and silly frivolity? Is Sober avoiding (if it can be avoided) the depths of melancholy and self pity? How many people are actually Sober in your state your country, the world? Not so many.

Most of my life, I believed I had been “Sober”. Actually, I was only “Sober” on paper since I did not drink nor do street drugs with a few backslidings with alcohol and teen experimentation with pot. I also smoked for a few years.  There was also that time I did the diet pills….For the most part, I did not drink, smoke, or use recreational drugs for almost 50 years. Still, I drink lots of coffee, eat lots of sugar and bread, and take psych drugs, including benzodiazepines.  I’m a junkie, really, if you get down to it.  I have also indulged myself emotionally in anger and ranting and cursing and long periods of self pity and depression.  My Sobriety comes in moments, maybe hours but never for even a day.

I think I have used this “sober clean living” thing as a facade.  It’s a platform for sinful pride.  I’m prideful that I do not indulge in cigarettes, alcohol, sleep with men, gamble, etc…makes me think I have an “in” with God.  It’s all a lie.  God looks at the heart.  Maybe some of His favorites are junkies sitting in alleys.  Mine is a hard fisted miserable sobriety done more for self preservation than to be “good”.  White knuckles could describe it.  If I had a buck for every time I’ve wanted a cigarette these past four years….

There are many actions and attitudes in today’s society that although they do not include beer, cigarettes or cocaine or even an innocent cup of coffee, are not “Sober” activities.

Giving way to anger and rage puts one in an altered state that is ungodly.  People who used to do various drugs and drinks and tell happy stories of those days or linger on those memories or still act immature are considered “dry drunks” by organizations such as AA.  People who indulge themselves in jealousy are taken over by a demon that can lead to murder.  If your cup of tea is melancholy it can lead you to living a “dark” lifestyle where the negative and even gross aspects of life gain importance and God loses out.  Some people use incredible amounts of legal supplements to get a sort of “high”, like the kind you get drinking Red Bull or Five Hour Energy.  Those substances are good in a pinch when extra energy is needed and there is little time for rest.  God knows I have had Red Bull and Five Hour Energy, I just avoid the occult looking Monster drink.

Some people get a high off of starving which some people say is the reason it is so hard to get anorexics to eat.  Some hallucinate on long fasts and keep going on them to get enlightenment or not.  Some people eat until they get sleepy enough to block out the world.  Some people use pornography for a temporary high. There is a hypnotic state achieved by watching a movie or even TV.  Between the constant ads, brainwashing and flicker rate TV and movies are a drug.  I used to feel a lot “better” when I used to watch TV for hours every evening.  Some people use compulsive and extravagant shopping trips to get a high.  Some people play video games for hours on end. Even poor people like me buy stuff we don’t need but want just to “feel better”.  NO one is totally “Sober”.

Most of us delude ourselves into thinking we are living “clean and sober”.  With our laundry list of little habits and emotions we retain a sort of high, just enough to get through a day.  If we were to be truly sober or all substances or media including starving, overeating, and shopping, it would be unendurable to most of us.  Were they more “Sober” in the old days without all the psych drugs and TV and coffee on every corner?  Maybe not.  People consumed a lot more alcohol than we do now and there was not a “drinking age”.  Alcohol was served at least once a day in an average household that was not overtly religious.  People smoked more, too, especially men.  Overall, they were “more Sober” than we are in this techno-controlled society.  Shopping was limited, there were not restaurants on every corner, no easily available porn, or psych drugs.  People were grateful to eat and did not worship “skinny”.  For some, they did not even get needful medication for their ills, living in constant pain.\

Could people live “Sober” today?  If one was willing to live without the TV, the Internet, Coffee, Sweets, any psych drugs, movies, drugs and alcohol and cigarettes, and even shopping except for necessities, you could be sort of “Sober”.  What about books?  Do some books make people high?  Would people have to live without novels or sensational journalism?  What about puzzles?  Where does it end?  Would we be hunched over a candle in a small room reading a Bible Commentary for hours or be like Lincoln reading Law by the fire?

Day Thirteen Serial Killer Part 2

On day four, you wrote a post about losing something. Today, write about finding something.

Tell us about the time you retrieved your favorite t-shirt from your ex. Or when you accidentally stumbled upon your fifth-grade journal in your parents’ attic. Or how about the moment you found out the truth about a person whose history or real nature you thought you’d figured out. Interpret this theme of “finding something” however you see fit.

Today’s twist: if you wrote day four’s post as the first in a series, use this one as the second installment — loosely defined.

You could pick up the action where you stopped, or jump backward or forward in time. You might write about the same topic, but use a different style, or use the same style to tackle a neighboring topic.

Not sure how to approach continuity? Here’s a time-tested tip: pick a favorite book or two. Read the last page of chapter one, then the first page of chapter two. How did the author choose to connect these two separate-but-connected narrative units?

In the last installment of a cereal killer I had lost everything:  my freedom, my joy, my laughter, my love of country, any trust I had for my family, any notion that I was “free” in any way.  If everything is lost and is not coming back, what is there to find?  There are small things, and thin comfort they are, but they exist nonetheless.

By losing everything by being a ti you gain the knowledge that everything is not as it seems in life and you are forced to walk around awake and not asleep.  The new knowledge you gain is painful and unpleasant as you see the nice little world around you crumble and ugly realities take their place.  No one is who they seem to be.  You cannot trust the news anymore, you cannot worship celebrities anymore.  Amusements don’t seem fun anymore if there are lots of people there.  You begin to see the multitude of amusements around you as stupifying activities for the hypnotized masses.  They go to amusements to waste time and get their pocketbooks raped.  Even simple passtimes like walking and visiting a library or museum are ruined by the presence of law enforcement and guards everywhere along with aircraft that dog you from the sky and of course the perps.  This is a thin recompense for your past life but at least its real.

You get a keen painful awareness that people are taking all kinds of trouble and time to get ahead in life but that if will give them nothing.  They attend school after school to attain degrees they will never use, or, if they use them at all they will work beneath their potential in a soul stealing job that they will probably lose due to layoffs or whatever whim the “boss” decides to use to get rid of them.  The few that succeed will have their souls (yes their souls) demanded of them if they wish to continue to be successful.  Some good people slip by and work hard in their fields all their life to be laid off with months to retirement and nothing to show for it.  Others will retire with some money only to have a long illness take it all away.  The only ones who grow rich and keep their money and toys are the evil ones.  Everyone else ends up in the poorhouse or in very lean circumstances otherwise.  This knowledge brings you nothing.  The perps even stop you when you try to learn something online to try and “get ahead”.  To learn for the sake of learning and not earning and for personal use and not economic use is a new concept for many,

You realize any happy or joyful moments are rare and do not return.  That any joy does not come from the amusements THEY provide but from God.  The hollow laughter at a sitcom, the scream on the roller coaster, or wild applause at a rock concert are plastic.  Did you ever get the feeling at a concert that you were there and supposed to be enjoying it but you didn’t and you felt crowded out and miserable in the dark amongst people you would cross the street to avoid?  You try to whoop and cheer and forget about it but the whole thing was plastic.  Did you leave the concert feeling cheated, almost raped?  I have.  I never shared that.  People brag about being at this concert or that, but the actual experience sucked.  There is more real joy in watching a bird fly or lightning in a storm.

The loss of family is real and cannot be replaced though.  How can you replace it?  If you have God in your heart and a relationship with Him, He can love you in the absence of family.  You still can’t replace family, though.