Moping Around at New Year’s

Moping Around on New Year’s

It’s been a tough year for me, and I didn’t post for most of it.  From V2k threats against posting, threats of eviction, perping, and all the rest, I can see this gangstalking gets worse every year.  This fall I have been gangstalked for 30 years.  I remember the weird behavior started when I returned home after trying to live out of state in late 1986.

There were a few blessings so it wasn’t all hellish.  Soon, very soon, 2017 will be here with a drastically new President.  Will it bode better for me and other ti’s or will it be worse?  Will I finally be able to be independent again going about my business on public transportation without much fear or will I be forever dependent on rides to get things done?

For the first time in months, I took myself somewhere.  It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be since today some companies are giving their employees the day off to compensate for New Year’s being on a weekday.  The buses were fairly empty but the store (wow I even took myself to the effing store!) was very crowded.

When I first found out I was a ti on January 9, 2005, I was determined not to stay in the house all the time.  I find myself at home lots more these past 3 years since I have been threatened on the bus going to the store in April, 2014.  I used to go somewhere everyday, even if just the park, despite heavy gangstalking.  Now I see it as not worth it.  Short, necessary trips are all I make and seldom.  I am afraid.  I am older.  The perps seem more aggressive.

I hope Trump restores some law and order so I won’t fear violence if I decide to exercise outside again.

A lot of people of the celebrity sort have died this year, most prematurely.  I don’t think I have long.  The perps put a picture in my head with a – dash 2017, like I might die this coming year.  The people in charge are winnowing out who they don’t like now.

I’m wasting my life. I’ve had V2k threats even for reading my library books and now they are very late.  I’ve even had V2k threats for sitting outside.  I waste my time besides the basics of living and Bible Study watching videos instead of reading books, being outside, exercising. listening to pastors on podcast, etc….I’m going to seed.  My brain needs work to do. I’m not interested in crossword puzzles anymore or crafts. I was “told” by a voice I could not use coloring books to fill out the time or ELSE.

There are very many homeless people here and they use it as a threat to me.  Last year, I heard as a threat, that I would become homeless, and on top of that, no one would help me and I would die a slow death outside.  I get very scared when we get cold spells.  We are going to get our third or fourth spell of zero weather after New Year’s.  It is colder than last year.  Colder and drier.  La Nina.  There is an old woman who has been staying outside on my block since July, and another group of homeless that have been here over a year.  Other groups come and go.

Even the homeless here seem cliquish and hang around each other, and yes, they perp.  Even living outside has expenses, and a Social Security check won’t even pay the rent around here if you are not in Section 8, so you live in fear.  When I started on Social Security, I could have just barely made it in my former 410 dollar a month apt with food stamps.  Now, the smallest studio is 900 dollars.  Food stamps have been cut.  I got more food stamps to start out with in 1999 than I get today.  I’d go back to work if I could get a living wage, health insurance, and no perp bullshit, e.g. getting set up to get fired time after time.

Now there is the Murphy Act that gives mental health providers the power to FORCE patients on drugs they don’t want even if they aren’t violent or suicidal.  They have shots that last 3 months so putting pills down the loo isn’t an option all the time.

For 6 or 7 of Obama’s 8 years Social Security recipients have had no raise at all or a very small one.  Prices keep going up.  There are rules living in Section 8, and if you lose your apt you could end up on the street.  This is not California or Florida.  I don’t have a car to live in.  It seems to be the “in” thing now to live in your car, work, and save up.  Sounds like a rough life to me.  I knew a woman who had to do it HERE where there is winter for 3 years with only her dog for warmth.  Her daughter would not take her in.  She’d let her own mother, who had to raise her as a single mom take a shower there.  I hate this world.

Please keep me from hating You, God.

I usually spend New Year’s with the covers over my head and music playing to drown out the sound of celebration.

The Summer of Orange

This past summer we were the victims recipients of a major construction project.  Our street got dug up three times to put in a new gas line.  The city hired out a contractor to do the work and they started at 7:00 am sharp M-F.  I would still be in bed and hear PSSSS of the air brakes then the sound of loud motors and beep beep beep.  They started a couple of blocks north of us in June and are still finishing up about 4 blocks away.

The first guy to work was the guy with the signs on the back of his truck.  He would put down all the lovely orange signs, etc…first.  STREET CLOSED.  CONSTRUCTION AHEAD.  NO PARKING.  Then the workers would start working and the sign twirlers would stand outside on the intersecting street with the stop/slow signs letting cars stop or go on the three inches of pavement that was left on the side street.  Laying the pipe in the intersection sort of really disrupted traffic as the street and the intersection was closed.

The street and the alley was closed for months so nights were quiet. Almost

Another project was going on across the alley with a house renovation and they stayed late into the nights and worked 7 days a week at least 14 hours a day, but they didn’t use heavy equipment as much.  Lots of hammering and drills and they took out THE TREE on the 4th of July.  If it grew dark they would move the work inside the house.

Back on the the street, it would be dug up:  asphalt first, then dirt.  Then a huge pipe was soldered together under a tent and installed in the hole.  They would fill up the hole, then use this MACHINE to stamp the asphalt into place.  Boom!  Boom! Boom!!!!  Then it was done.

No it wasn’t.  They dug it up again for some reason, maybe to get the official nod to their project.  Then the dirt went back in and the asphalt was rolled then.  Boom!  Boom!  Boom!  Then it was done.

No it wasn’t.  It was done a THIRD time.  I think they laid that line on just my block for a month.  After that they v-e-r-y slowly moved on still keeping their pipes, etc…on our block while digging on the next.  This went on around us until September?  They aren’t set to finish until next year or so.  Also there was no parking on the street for a couple of months.  I still see their trucks going by to and from where they are working now.

Now there is a new construction project going on a block away, so the orangemen are still around.  It’s a highrise so it will take a lot longer.  There’s another one a block away too:  cranes in the air!  At first that one was fun, too.

Just as the street opened semis full of dirt would come by from 7 to 5 all day as they dug the foundation.  Now it looks pretty quiet over there but they are still working.  Gears grinding, air brakes….it was fun.  Only a few people are there now but I bet it will be a big deal in Spring, if it comes.  We never had Fall, much. It seemed to go from Summer to Winter, Summer lasting until late November.

Someone with a suspicious can of colored paint is walking up and down the street making little colored dots…wonder if we are gonna get dug up again.