Perps Threaten Again—You Never Know You are in a Cage Until You Feel Your Chains

I want to go back and take Writing 101 because there are new assignments but every time I took a WP writing course, something bad happened as the perps don’t want me to better myself but just sit around.  I remember my computer dying last year around the time I took Writing 101, or, was it after?  I don’t remember.  The perps don’t want me bettering myself.  I think the deadline has passed.  I think what else can they take away and I remember last Spring when I had no Internet for 6 weeks…and a few other things.

I found out how large my cage is.  The last time I was out of state was in early 2003 when I visited my estranged sister for 4 whole days, and, since then, I have not been more than say, 3 hours drive from “home”.  I looked up this application that will put in a diameter of a certain number of miles around your home.  With one exception of only about 5 miles, every place I have been to since 2003 has been within 100 miles of here.  That includes the loong day trip I took back in December.  It seemed so long because we were mostly wandering around.  The area that seemed SOOO REMOTE was within the CIRCLE.

Talk about control.

This is even weirder.  I went on another day trip two days ago to get the effff out of here since I don’t spend overnights at my former friend’s house.  A man who knows her sort of hangs out with me.  He has the car.  What was going to be a great day was ruined by perps.  First, we got a very early start and I had not made coffee so we stopped 20 min out of town to get some.  A perp waited for me.  Later, we stopped for a huge breakfast and the staff were rude and perpy and even made a big deal when a song by the group I used to follow came on the radio.  The waitress kept calling me “love” and we’re not in England.

We drive to a semi remote spot he used to go to years ago to relax and a very perpy couple are there.  We kept “running into” this skinny nasty looking woman on the trail and her husband sat in a canoe in the lake beneath us when we stopped as if he was listening.  My friend mentioned this woman once when we were sitting and she popped around the corner.  I said “speak of the devil” under my breath.

Later, we stopped for dinner in a very small town even though I thought we had had enough to eat that day–at least until we got back to town.  The waitress was very rude to me and muttered “curse you” every time she passed me.  We took a long time ordering because I was not that hungry and my friend thought the food was a bit expensive.  The waitress said “are you just ordering water?”  We should have walked out.  He ordered a burger and I got an appetizer.  Flies kept landing on us and the food.  (Do you want some flies with that?)  Then, if it could not get any worse, my old landlord from the 1990s strolls in……I said nothing until we were in the car.  This was the landlord was sort of a medium slumlord when I rented from him and then he became a real estate magnate to the yuppie gentrifying crowd as time went on.  Now, he’s sort of a local “hero” and fabulously rich.  Why he’d want to be at this little hole in the wall cafe was beyond me.

It was so sad–the one thing that could still make me happy–getting out of this evil city–sucked.  Even in the streets of that little town there were two perps laughing and giggling and spouting my business running down the street.  Wearing black t-shirts and billy GOAT beards of course.  The devil is a busy man and he does not rest now.  I could not get rid of the stink of perp even away from the city.  I had had fond childhood memories visiting it with my parents.  Everything is gone to hell on Earth

I thought I saw my old landlord visiting the building across the street a few weeks ago.  Is he buying it???  The whole neighborhood is now named after a moniker he gave it…it’s a nightmare coming true.  I thought I had escaped him and his building when I got kicked out after losing my job in 1998. He used to live on the top floor of my building.  He was my neighbor in a way.

I had nightmares of coming back to live there for 10 years.  Now I can’t even go to the park near my apt because his big “project” is right on the next block.  Once, when I was in the park, he came into the park and it looked to me as if he was inspecting it to buy it.  The CITY owns the park.  Is he the city?  The next park up the river is partially funded by the DOD and I was V2k’d about not going there.  I go there maybe once a year now.

I can’t get away from the man.  My father and his uncle were best friends growing up in the Jewish “hood” of this city until my father’s friend DIED at TEN!!!!!  My father never got along with the nephew, my former landlord. They are about 17? years apart????  My father died in his 90s last year.  They both practiced law until the nephew of my Dad’s friend went into real estate.  My father should never have let me rent from him, but when did he ever really care about me?  A little?  Sometimes?  Maybe?  It’s all so weird.  There must be a heck of a backstory.  That and my Masonic grandfather on my mother’s side and the weird time my aunt had in Chicago…and me “inheriting” the whole mess…or is it something I did?  I might have pissed off a celeb, too.  It’s too much.

I still have not posted that post about Myron May.  I rewrote it in Spring?, so I could post it then got V2k threatened AGAIN.  i can’t find the rewritten version.  Voice to Skullers probably terrorized me into shredding it.

I watched his 3-part videotaped Suicide Note.  It was sad.  It seemed he never had that many friends in his life…that his relationships were…tenuous.  Here he was, successful, but still single.  He said he was distant with his siblings.  I think the “perps” look for those who are loners and that is why I am so crushed by losing my only friend.

He spoke of his harassment, how he would miss his family and “friends” which seemed more like acquaintances to me, then said that “what he was going to do” was going to get the word out about gangstalking.  I doubt that.  I really blame “other ti’s” for pushing him away.  He saw, rightly, a lifetime of misery.  I was bullied and accused by “other ti’s”, some probably moles for the enemy, on “ti” message boards and chats.

That left me with my only friend and my father.  My father moved away and stopped speaking to me, and my sister stopped speaking to me, then, my only friend started being on and off with me and now it seems permanent not without first slandering me in a horrible way and even calling police on me.

I should write the Myron May post as if my life depended on it.  I guess people would be all upset that I would write anything in sympathy of him because he was black and now I’m being accused of being a super racist by my lovely “neighbor” and it seems every black person in this city somehow magically believes her.  I don’t have a history of that.  I’m not on “stormfront”.

It makes my life even more miserable to have a race card attached to me.  All this political correctness and you can’t say anything that MAY BE CONSTRUED as ANYTHING.  The woman was moved in here on perpose to destroy me.  The previous tenants of that apt were also miserable to me.

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